I try to take my mom out to lunch about once each week. She lives ten minutes from us, in a lovely dementia care assisted living unit that is part of a much larger, 3-stage retirement community.
I pick her up, find her pink sun visor, and we begin our S L O W walk outside, up the elevator and down the long, covered, outdoor corridor to the new Life Center building.
Inside is a wonderful cafe, with a brick oven for fresh pizza, and a nice selection of sandwiches and salads. Her favorites are the cheeseburger and cheese pizza. Sometimes a hot dog.
These lunchtimes are a very mixed experience. It’s lovely to just sit with her in the outdoor, covered patio. We enjoy the food and each other’s company. But when she tries to make conversation, it can get dicey. She finds it harder and harder to tell me what she’s thinking. And she knows it. Sometimes when she’s struggling — and there is no way I can help her as I don’t know where she’s headed — I find my eyes wandering.
And these bright pink geraniums on a nearby second-story balcony are often what I choose to focus on. Why? Because they’re bright and beautiful, a reminder that life is good and rich as well as difficult and painful.
Somehow, they always make me feel better. Then I can give Mom my full attention, tell her how sorry I am that it’s such a struggle for her, and together, we find our way to another quiet space.
Where do you need a spot of brightness in your life these days?